Review of 'Sleep No More' - an experience in New York

Its our 4th wedding anniversary, and we saw 'Sleep no More', as Vartika had blocked tickets and wanted to see it since a long time.

It's a unique experience. You got to seek the characters, scenes, and the story yourself. No commentary, no prodding, no guideline, no sequence to help you. Initially surprising, you start to figure out what's going on. The acting is highly intense, rooms quite gloomy with dim lights and classical music playing, ghost masks on each audience member surrounding the actors. Created a haunted aura but not scary. It was psychologically intense, storing up emotions, shocks, pity, sadness, empathy, envy, lust and others on your mind. Whilst this is going on, you also need to run up and down the stairs (5 floors with hundreds of rooms) and seek where the actor is going next and who are they going to interact with. Some scenes when all of them come together - ballroom dance, dinner, orgy, blood bath is when all audience come together and you see crowd of ghosts staring at all actors and absorbing their mime and movements. The ruthless nature of murders and orgy, dry faces and evil looks, in your face nudity and sex scenes stir your mind quite a bit while creating a lasting impression. 

Working in Analytics and Visualization, this sense of Immersive Storytelling experience was something I could totally relate to. This is what I sell to clients go change the nature of Collaborative decision-making via group discussions, issue discovery, co-investigation and resolutions with your own understanding. Everyone in the audience can theoretically gain a different, new yet completely right insight through their own path.

Another exciting part was that if you stared into an actor's eyes, they would hold your hand and take you to a closed room alone where you experience their acting in person, alone and different. I saw 5 people in different scenes experiencing this. The last 2 were escorted at the end of the play go to bar on 2nd floor where they kissed passionately and left smiling.

I had gone into it without an iota of knowledge and hence it hit me very hard. People who had read or seen reviews before hand may not have been as surprised.

Quite different from the static, fixed play where someone is taking you through the play with a predefined commentary, scene sequence, practiced and times scenes and interactions.

It was a beautiful experience, such as life itself- while your paths are different and decided by you, the destination is something you can decide, and the journey itself will be the exciting artful experience that is most important irrespective of the outcome. Salud!

Impressions

Delhi. When I first visited Delhi, I was 12 years old, and with my family. You know how it is. You don't know whats happening. People are taking you everywhere, to see this that, and you somehow have to find fun in everything that is happening, trying to find some games/ice cream.. There was terrible heat, we were in old Delhi which was crowded like people waiting to get to heaven. The roads were full, with vehicles of all kinds, auto rickshaws, cycle rickshaws, buses, bullock carts, etc. and no traffic signals. You can't imagine.

6 months ago, I went to Delhi to go to Ladakh. Stayed there for 4 days at a friends place in New Delhi. This time it was quite different. It wasn't that hot. It wasn't that crowded. It was with rules. Traffic Rules. Was with the University Road. The One with the Janpath. With Chandni Chowk. My My. What a place. The whole feel was different. There was a feel.
The article I wrote about it 6 months ago.. (http://sagar-gujju.blogspot.com/2008/06/dilli-durbar-so-having-listened.html)

Red

This is truly dedicated to Orhan Pamuk, for his book 'My Name is Red'. I just loved the book. Loved it. The style, reminds me of a line by Guy Maupassant in one of his essays, ' Taking a line for a walk'.

This might be at an abstract level, but I would nevertheless like to jot down what comes to my mind by this colour, since recently, it has affected my thinking quite a bit.

The colour red.

Strength. It signifies a force, so strong that it penetrates straight from my eye into the brain. It stares at me. Generates a feeling that something is there. And it won't budge. However hard I try to look away, it cannot escape the eye.

It signifies danger, blood. Am hemophobic. Scared of blood. I just dip unconscious at the sight of blood.

It brings back Naruto. The Nine Tailed Red Fox inside him. Always, fighting to get control over him. And he fights, so hard that you get to sympathize with him for having such a fate.

Red, is the colour for courage, strength and pioneering spirit. It instigates a strong will, a confident and spontaneous quality.

Red is energising and excites the emotions, and can stimulate the appetite, hence often used in restaurants. It can be used in any activity area but red needs careful choice of tone and depth and the space in which it is to be used as it can make a space look smaller and can be claustrophobic or oppressive. However, used well, red and its variations, can make a space feel warm and cosy.

Red repersents vibrancy. Energy. Chakra. Totally Upbeat personality. Always on your toes, moving, Jab We Met ki Kareena. Never sad. The thing called morale.. Red is dhinch. Its Gujju.

Bindaas. That defines Red. You just love yourself, when you are Red. I want to be red. I want everyone to be Red. It would be such a beautiful world, if everyone would be red. Red Is bold.

Red-blooded is someone who is audacious, robust, virile.

The colour of a bride's dress. Of a Tilak. Sindhoor.

Gulal. The colour of Holi. Festival of Happiness and Celebration.

However, in the most negative aspect, it is the colour of anger, violence and brutality, dominating and stubbornness. Red is associated with lust, passion and beauty. It is used as a symbol of guilt or sin, often as connected with blood or sex. Red is associated with brothels (red-light districts). Red represents the deadly sin wrath. Satan is usually depicted as colored red.

Bright. On the psycho-spiritual level, it relates to self awareness. That is to say our awareness of ourselves as human beings and our place on earth. Relates to our basic human instincts of fighting. Red gives us courage and strength. The colour relates to stability and security. When am out of mood, I like to remember this colour and get inspired of the spirit which we are embodied of, to face challenges, learning to fight against all odds, its a battle. Of me against myself. And I have to win. Just like Luhrmanns sunscreen - 'In the end, the race is with yourself'

Red is Love. For all the above reasons.

what the hell

different as it goes
the tap of the toes
minding nothing but you
everythings just a dew
real though it feels
made up of a few reels
when will we know
whats hail and whats snow
hits hard a rock
though light as chalk
straightens the mind
being jolly and kind
being with me only me
being busier than a bee
keeping from society
lifes my propriety!

Stoned thoughts

I play a weirdly amusing game with myself on the trivialest of things. Like speed of my eyes shutting, my hand movement, air temperature feeling my cheek, time of journey left. There are two little rabbits betting, both called Sagar. One of them wins, and the pleasure is mine. Either way. I justify everything sharply. Time is slow. There are no negatives. Just floating mind, quivering about to strange thoughts. A point to discuss. Yes, discuss. Not opining, not justifying, but arguing. And logically concluding what I wished for. Then I make up funny jokes and let one of the rabbits laugh. I score the games am playing. I'm winning. Then I realize how important, those streetlights are. The next moment, am seeing psychadelia. Am moving my toes to some music of Floyd. And it sounds real. Suddenly, I prick myself, to know this is real. And it turns out its not. I open my eyes, and just forget the thought experiment of pricking, and start off again. Suddenly the cute girl from Little Miss Sunshine is doing the dance. And I'm laughing off crazy. I remember the bumps story saip told me. just realized how it relates to DAC, for ali etc people in my second year. A picture comes to my mind, stupefying me. I look at it, touch it, roll my fingers over it, feel it and realize that its the screensaver of win player, Vista. Fishes start swimming, birds flying, and small bugs crawling. I run away, and find myself in the middle of nowhere, trying to find a person, whose face I have forgotten. I find a sea shell and become satisfied. The next thing I see, is Tom Hanks worshipping some sorta football. I say nuts, and realize this is from cast away. So am I cast away. I pinch myself, to realize its main gate. I get off to sign. Come back to my room. Change, lie down. Eat choco good day, talk to a friend. Get up to seeoff utki. Bloating heads. Mumbles of this that. Chatter. But not painful. Am smiling the whole time, asif I know some sorta secret. I'm right. I feel correct in what I think, walk, do , talk and my minds a captured picture. Motionless. And yet very alive. I realize its over. The next moment, am again in the battle field of thoughts, deciding what the next move is, what my next conclusion should be, decide right from wrong, and optimize over thoughts. It sucks. Yet I feel steady. There are a lot of steady states to stick to. Just know your particular one.
'Raah pakad tu ek chala chal, paa jaayega madhushaala.'
Continue after Bhavani Juice.

Yellow. How have you been? Continuing on my bed time blogging, fools listen and fools talk.
My god granted wish of being genuine, should turn out to be true once I find myself. And yes, I will tell you about it. Crossing the finish line, winning the race and losing my mind (lazlo). Got to feed the soul. Maybe it is just a mandatory deal to constantly improve ( tooo harsh a word, i must say; rather should be using introspect and keep it all locked away in once head. The interactions of the memory bytes within themselves, will yield some sorta result which may be simple enough to comprehend), or it is just over philosophy which was earlier known as pseudo intellectual gibberish, put in very lucid terms by kenkre, as a trial to be a buddhijeevi.
Lekin vastavikta. Kya ismein jeena zaroori hain.

Strikes my head suddenly. Fuck! forgot! Just saw a beautiful pic of Belluci, man shes hot!
Looked out of my window, and saw a beautiful leaf falling on the grill. Transferred epithet. Metacognition power should be removed. Forrest Gump. Running through my head. Its not enough. There has to be something. Ignorance is bliss, and realizations. Into the Wild, is a dangerous one. The Wild One, is a movie am dying to watch. The dialogue, "So what are you rebelling against? A: Whaddya got? " is a pathbreaker.

Sometimes, I think this intellectual capacity provided to individuals to opine, and then justify what they just said, is a false alarm. It has to be the other way around. Intution should be logified. Twist of fate.

Pondering, I was analysing the randomness of everything happening, the flowing of the day, and lunch times, and coding, and hanging out. Moments, coming and going. Happily going by. Like it doesn't matter. And the contrary side of it, planned day, with its timelines and deadlines, fully scheduled manners. And the randomness currently, (3 days or so) scares me. Is this it? Is this how its going to be? Or my capability to plan and execute should be applied to remove this uncertainty. The tradeoff of choosing the 'better one'. How can the better one be chosen since I don't know what results from the other not so good choice? Judgement and happiness are not related. Or are they?

And such a waste of life over small decisions. Trivial issues. Self-doubt. Regrets. Future predictions. Status messages. Wallah. ! What a sexy way to put what you are thinking, or what you find cool enough to define your mood or personality. I hear 'bblaabbbeerrrs, stop it now!'.

Relaxed life is what very few understand is the best way to live life. We, at times, get too serious about ourselves, and think wishfully. Be ambitious, be good, work hard, and wait for the results.
Listen to Lazlo yaar.

I follow noone. I don't follow any sport. :D
I'm the Iron man!

Just realized the deepest funda. Sell Happiness. Thats the basic motto of any company that is successful. Was looking at a guy innocently smiling and typing in orkut. Just give everyone happiness, and get paid for it! Yes.

And yes, am winning. The score is still ticking.

Dialogues I love:
1. Whaddya got?
2. Vastavikta mein jeena seekho major.
3. Uthna, baithna,..
4. buddhijeeviyon ki tarah baat karna, tyohar manana, ishq ladana, jeena.
5. Stupid is that stupid does.
6. Vaise hume jyaada baat karne ki aadat to nahi...
7. Bhagvaan hans raha hain oopar se. Khel raha hain humare saath. Aur hum samajh nahi paa rahe ki yeh ek game hain. Bus.
8. Take Leave
the conscious mind
Found myself
to be so inclined

Why sleep
in discontent?
Oh the price
of companionship

My shadow runs with me
underneath the Big Wide Sun
My shadow comes with me
as we leave it all
we leave it all Far Behind

9. And the best one:

society, have mercy on me
I hope you're not angry if I disagree
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me.

10. All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
I like watchin' the puddles gather rain
And all I can do is just pour some tea for two
and speak my point of view
But it's not sane, It's not sane
I just want some one to say to me
I'll always be there when you wake
Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today
So stay with me and I'll have it made
And I don't understand why I sleep all day
And I start to complain that there's no rain
And all I can do is read a book to stay awake
And it rips my life away, but it's a great escape


All we seek is recognition. From people who are close to us. To check our basics. Confirm what we are. To satisfy our egos.

I talk very less now. I have realized that communication without purpose is no worth. People talk and talk. They talk about the misfortune of slumdwellers, or the downtrodden. They speak of global warming. They speak of electricity. They speak of paper waste. And what next? They sympathize about them, and revert to their basic lifestyle. Damn you ! If you have the bloody guts to realize all this, and speak about it, they be auudacious enough to make a change, contribute! Be a stepping stone to what you want to change. This is my opinion. Some might differ. Some may think, discussing is another step to doing something. Maybe, if you have that in mind, good for you.

I don't feel like talking most of the times. Except when I think its mandatory to give an opinion. Or for timepass, to make fun, and to laugh. But not to opine. I hate uncomfortable silences. Why do you think its necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable? Thats when you know you found someone special.When you can just fuck up for a minute and comfortably share silence. (")

Colourful nonsense for aesthetically superior brainheads written in a flairy manner to impress and self-potray an image, a perception of the world around reflecting on himself.

Do you see the randomness? If you don't then you understand me better than I do.

'Probably'

The word hits me so many a time.

Prolly might be there in 15 minutes. Prolly we can watch that movie. Prolly it will rain. Hes prolly happy. He prolly in some corner of the world, doing nothing.

Due to some instinctive delight, I have always fought in my mind and with od, that it doesn't exist. I just can't make a decision in accordance with probability. Life cannot be framed with probable decisions. This ones highly probable, so lets do this. This has a higher chance of being right. Or be successful. Rather take that least probable decision, and make it true. Rather just consider everything to be dependent on some unknown assumption, which you cannot decipher, and hence remove the factor of probability on any account. You can as well say, I might be hitler. In my last janam. But then shaama is, in this one right? :D

Coming back, there are statistics, if you put money in something everyday based on statistics and future predictions with 80 % prob, you might as well toss a coin everyday, or relate the success to the colour of the sky that day. You prolly will make money for 4 days, but then lose it all again the 5 th day.

Most significant decisions in my life have been taken on pure instinct, or my hears content rather.
I just with there is prolly a door waiting to be opened in every brain, releasing light to the owner or maybe people standing nearby serving as an ablution to every dirt, every opinion, every bias, every desire. You go in dirty, you come out clean. Thats the door to your bathroom. :D

I have to leave, jassi getting angry of me writing all this 'shit', so will take leave, and prolly come back with more proll shit, now let me end for now with his shit.

Probably, happiness in the world is constant. You become happy, you take someones share of it and make him unhappy. Maybe thats why you got a reason to smile, when you are not grabbing someone else's.

Colour

Once again, I return to my obsession with colours.

The soothing effect of white, when chosen as a background, just like the last scene of the movie Black. Transcends space to a meadow, butterflies playing with each other, birds flying in a pattern, and the grass wetting my feet, drowsing me in the lightness of nothingness.

Black. Sultry. Slick. Sexy. Sharp. Eye Catcher. A sexy chick wearing an evening gown, with her black hair falling on her shoulders, with the perfect walk and a smile which is not too happy, and not too expressionless. Just the perfect attitude for you. And me. The grace of a guy walking in his gucci blazer, just having alighted from a black porsche, with his black cellfone, and straight hair like the in 'I like the way you move'. A black screen, in the middle of the night, showing such glimpses. The darkness captured. The shadow of a person you were expecting since an hour. Black Nike shoes. A black Del.

Azure skies. Blues that you get caught up in. Blues that you always wear. The commonness of the favouritism by major teenagers. The smart chick in a blue top and denims, walking with her busy look, avoiding to look at the onlookers. The cuteness of a kid in a denim jacket. The Superman attire. The happy colour. Youthful, casual and trendy. The safest colour to choose when you are confused. It just works.

Green. Speaks more than blue. A tad more enterprising. Sexier. Cooler. Makes you sense a cool breeze over a lawn. Freshens up spirits. Pleasant. Might become dull at times, though.

But my favourite is still red.